Jokes? Jokes, anyone... (Read 97369 times)

Flapp_Jackson

Re: Jokes? Jokes, anyone...
« Reply #900 on: April 04, 2017, 11:40:55 PM »
I'm not saying I'm Batman, but I am saying the two of us have never been seen together!

Rocky

Re: Jokes? Jokes, anyone...
« Reply #901 on: April 12, 2017, 12:02:11 PM »
   The other day Rockette sez to me our daughter left a message  saying she had some important news to share with us and would call us later.

Of course daddy mode kicked in and I said, Ya think she's pregnant?

To which Rockette replied " Impossible, she has an IED.   :shake: :shake: :shake:


 :rofl: :rofl:

“I ask you to judge me by the enemies I have made.”
                                                           Franklin D. Roosevelt

Flapp_Jackson

Re: Jokes? Jokes, anyone...
« Reply #902 on: April 15, 2017, 05:01:12 PM »
This is why the human race is doomed ....

I'm not saying I'm Batman, but I am saying the two of us have never been seen together!

mrgaf

Re: Jokes? Jokes, anyone...
« Reply #903 on: April 15, 2017, 07:50:28 PM »
Some funnies..... :shaka:

littlemisssunshine

Re: Jokes? Jokes, anyone...
« Reply #904 on: April 16, 2017, 09:02:09 PM »
Knock, knock!

Who’s there?

Opportunity!

That is impossible. Opportunity doesn’t come knocking twice!

Bunker

Re: Jokes? Jokes, anyone...
« Reply #905 on: April 20, 2017, 06:10:30 PM »

Rocky

Re: Jokes? Jokes, anyone...
« Reply #906 on: April 20, 2017, 06:19:26 PM »
“I ask you to judge me by the enemies I have made.”
                                                           Franklin D. Roosevelt

Mr. Farknocker

Re: Jokes? Jokes, anyone...
« Reply #907 on: April 20, 2017, 08:24:11 PM »
In light of the recent events that have drawn negative attention to the airlines,  United Airlines has kicked off a campaign to boost consumer confidence and reclaim it's dominance in the industry with a new corporate motto.  Of the 200 suggestions offered, the committee has narrowed it down to the top 15:

1.  “Drag and Drop”

2.  “We put the hospital in hospitality”

3.  “Board as a doctor, leave as a patient”

4.  “Our prices can’t be beaten, but our passengers can”

5.  “We have First Class, Business Class and No Class”

6.  “Not enough seating, prepare for a beating”

7.  “We treat you like we treat your luggage”

8.  “We beat the customer. Not the competition”

9.  “And you thought leg room was an issue”

10.  “Where voluntary is mandatory”

11.  “Fight or flight. We decide”

12.  “Now offering one free carry off”

13.  “Beating random customers since 2017”

14.  “If our staff needs a seat, we’ll drag you out by your feet”

15.  “A bloody good airline"
« Last Edit: April 20, 2017, 08:34:44 PM by Mr. Farknocker »