2aHawaii
General Topics => Legal and Activism => Topic started by: mrgaf on August 21, 2017, 03:28:29 PM
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My friends daughter called him up and told him that her ex's fiance'e texted her and said she saw her father drive past her home and that he "looked" at the house as he drove by. It's unfortunate that his daughter and her ex live pretty much live across the street from each other. The town house complex they live in has two entrances/exits one of which goes rite past her ex's home. He said he always comes in one way and leaves via the other but he could care less about his daughters ex and his fiance'e. He said he has never approached either one of them has not said anything to them as well as never approached them or harassed them or set foot on their property. Bad thing is he has guns and this woman and his daughters ex know this. Told him just go the same way he came in and avoid going past. He's worried that she will try to get a TRO against him. Told him not to worry. What's your thoughts?
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A common sense judge would not issue a TRO for this but we are in Hawaii. Common sense is few and far between.
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Common sense is not so common.
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DOCUMENTATION. DOCUMENTATION.
Suggest the friend's daughter go with her father to file a police report for harassment and take the text messages. If she can print them, even better.
Nothing needs to come of the complaintt, but documenting the text message contents would go a long way toward establishing the ex or his fiancé is escalating the harassment by filing a TRO if/when that happens.
A little time, effort and documentation can protect them. He who files a complaint first is always in the better position.
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Crimes or threats of violence have to be made to get a TRO. Just stay away, don't talk to them, and don't get lured into something. If the ex causes trouble, get witnesses and document it and make a police report showing that he's the victim.
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Crimes or threats of violence have to be made to get a TRO. Just stay away, don't talk to them, and don't get lured into something. If the ex causes trouble, get witnesses and document it and make a police report showing that he's the victim.
The best witness can be your cell phone. Turn on the video recorder if you're ever in an uncomfortable situation -- whether it's with the ex, the fiancé or an out-of-control HPD representative. :thumbsup:
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Is the concern essentially 1) that the other party knows that your friend owns guns and 2) that they live in such close proximity as normal/innocent comings and goings would be construed (or asserted by the other party) as stalking/harassment?
Sorry, didn't quite follow the friend's, daugther's, ex'es, cousin's. . .
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Is the concern essentially 1) that the other party knows that your friend owns guns and 2) that they live in such close proximity as normal/innocent comings and goings would be construed (or asserted by the other party) as stalking/harassment?
Sorry, didn't quite follow the friend's, daugther's, ex'es, cousin's. . .
Ok my friends daughter lives across the street from her ex. Her ex's fiance'e lives with him. When my friend goes to his daughters house he goes in one entrance of the complex and leaves from the only other exit which takes him past his daughters ex's house. No I'll intentions nor has he ever approached them, said anything or trespassed but his daughters ex's fiance'e said my friend looked at her house and that she does not want my friend to drive past her home any more. The ex and his sweetie know he has firearms and is worried, due to this woman's attempted actions against his daughter, will try something like a TRO. Told him to leave the way he came, get copies of the text she sent to his daughter and not to worry.
Answers to you questions are
1. Yes
2. Yes exactly.... the ex's fiance'e did not threaten with any legal action but her past actions against his daughter is causing him concern....
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Ok my friends daughter lives across the street from her ex. Her ex's fiance'e lives with him. When my friend goes to his daughters house he goes in one entrance of the complex and leaves from the only other exit which takes him past his daughters ex's house. No I'll intentions nor has he ever approached them, said anything or trespassed but his daughters ex's fiance'e said my friend looked at her house and that she does not want my friend to drive past her home any more. The ex and his sweetie know he has firearms and is worried, due to this woman's attempted actions against his daughter, will try something like a TRO. Told him to leave the way he came, get copies of the text she sent to his daughter and now worry.
Answers to you questions are
1. Yes
2. Yes exactly....
Got it. From the other responses, I thought I was missing something. Like one mentioned things escalating. Not that I disagree with the suggestions, just didn't pick up on that. Seems like things are escalating or there's worry for potential to because you clarified with "due to this woman's attempted actions against his daughter". What has the ex's fiancée done so far?
Damn. That does suck to have your home become somewhat of a worry like that. I can understand your friend's worry about "what ifs" as well as concern about simply being a gun owner used against him.
Seems like your friend is level headed and isn't starting things. I would hope that just being noticed driving wouldn't be near enough for a TRO. That said, I wouldn't put is past anyone to make up stuff. In fact, a buddy is going through that right now where the "she said" is all that was seemingly enough for him to get arrested.
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Got it. From the other responses, I thought I was missing something. Like one mentioned things escalating. Not that I disagree with the suggestions, just didn't pick up on that. Seems like things are escalating or there's worry for potential to because you clarified with "due to this woman's attempted actions against his daughter". What has the ex's fiancée done so far?
Damn. That does suck to have your home become somewhat of a worry like that. I can understand your friend's worry about "what ifs" as well as concern about simply being a gun owner used against him.
Seems like your friend is level headed and isn't starting things. I would hope that just being noticed driving wouldn't be near enough for a TRO. That said, I wouldn't put is past anyone to make up stuff. In fact, a buddy is going through that right now where the "she said" is all that was seemingly enough for him to get arrested.
She tried to get a TRO against his daughter because she dropped something in his mailbox concerning a paper that required his signature for their daughters school. The judge threw it out....
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Update....
My friend got a copy of the email that was sent to his daughter concerning his "drive by". She was told that her father needs to use the other exit out of the complex, he has driven past her house several time and he slowed down when he drove by this last time (my friend told me he went to his daughters house on Sunday to drop some food to his daughter and kids. They were not home so he just continued on past this yoyos house and exited the complex). She was also told her family needs to " stop stalking her and her fiance'e with these drive bys".
What a friggin joke.
Told him to ignore this fool and just go out the way he came in......
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Have your friends family stop talking completely. Sounds like that person is trying to get attention or lure him into a trap. They're going to wind up getting into an argument and she's going to win. He just has to tell her to stop all communications and document it. If she continues then it could be considered harassment.
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Have your friends family stop talking completely. Sounds like that person is trying to get attention or lure him into a trap. They're going to wind up getting into an argument and she's going to win. He just has to tell her to stop all communications and document it. If she continues then it could be considered harassment.
Exactly. I actually spoke with him and his daughter last night. Told him to just leave the complex the way he came in. Steer clear on going past the the apartment. He has not spoken a word to her ex or his bimbo and said he will continue as such. As for his daughter though that might be a different story. She has to communicate with them since her ex also has custody of the kids.
Bottom line is he should just avoid leaving the complex the way he has been, go the other way and pretend they don't exist.
Thanks for all the advice....
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She tried to get a TRO against his daughter because she dropped something in his mailbox concerning a paper that required his signature for their daughters school. The judge threw it out....
The ex's fiancée sounds like a real piece of work. Good to hear that she tried for a TRO and the judge saw through it.
You gave good advice and I agree that he should just mind his business and pretend they don't even exist. One thought was a dash cam so that in case the crazy woman starts stuff, it can be documented and she can't turn it into her playing victim.
Hope things go smoothly. Sounds like some real life Jerry Springer stuff. . .
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IDK the entire story of how they became involved, but this is why I don't shit where I eat.
I'm also super confused of who is who.
So your friends daughter had a fiance who is a girl?
"Her ex-fiance lives with him"? Him who? The dad?
This thread is more complicated than reading gun laws. JK.
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Could be a case where she wants to get back with him and will do crazy things to do it.
I heard a story about a couple involved in domestics They split up but still lived in the same house. She got drunk and high and called the police complaining that he beat her. No injuries on her and the guy was very chill. Turns out the story was made up and she was hoping that they could get back together somehow through this.
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IDK the entire story of how they became involved, but this is why I don't shit where I eat.
I'm also super confused of who is who.
So your friends daughter had a fiance who is a girl?
"Her ex-fiance lives with him"? Him who? The dad?
This thread is more complicated than reading gun laws. JK.
Characters:
MrGaf's friend (friend)
His daughter. (Daughter)
Daughters ex-boyfriend. (Ex)
Ex-boyfriend's fiancé ( Wackadoodle)
Friend lives elsewhere.
Daughter lives in very close proximity to Ex and Wackadoodle.
Wackadoodle has a history of giving daughter grief.
Friend drives by Ex and Wackadoodle's place when leaving complex after visiting Daughter on occasion. (Comes in one entrance to complex and leaves out the other. The other entrance takes him past Wackadoodle's place)
Wackadoodle sent email to Daughter saying Daughter's family better stop stalking them by driving by house. Even accused Friend of slowing down as he passes.
Basically saying to never use the other entrance/exit.
Friend small Kine worried about Wackadoodle trying to file trumped up TRO against him jeopardizing his 2A. (Wackadoodle knows he's a gun owner)
Consensus seems to be to just avoid use of the other entrance/exit and only use the one that doesn't pass Wackadoodle's place so as to avoid the whole mess.
And document the crap out of everything.
Seems like he should be able to use whatever entrance/exit he wants but it does sound like by avoiding the Wackadoodle's house he would be avoiding the set-up bait so probably sound advice.
Did I miss anything?
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Characters:
MrGaf's friend (friend)
His daughter. (Daughter)
Daughters ex-boyfriend. (Ex)
Ex-boyfriend's fiancé ( Wackadoodle)
Friend lives elsewhere.
Daughter lives in very close proximity to Ex and Wackadoodle.
Wackadoodle has a history of giving daughter grief.
Friend drives by Ex and Wackadoodle's place when leaving complex after visiting Daughter on occasion. (Comes in one entrance to complex and leaves out the other. The other entrance takes him past Wackadoodle's place)
Wackadoodle sent email to Daughter saying Daughter's family better stop stalking them by driving by house. Even accused Friend of slowing down as he passes.
Basically saying to never use the other entrance/exit.
Friend small Kine worried about Wackadoodle trying to file trumped up TRO against him jeopardizing his 2A. (Wackadoodle knows he's a gun owner)
Consensus seems to be to just avoid use of the other entrance/exit and only use the one that doesn't pass Wackadoodle's place so as to avoid the whole mess.
And document the crap out of everything.
Seems like he should be able to use whatever entrance/exit he wants but it does sound like by avoiding the Wackadoodle's house he would be avoiding the set-up bait so probably sound advice.
Did I miss anything?
Hahaha yup confusing, yup screwed up, yup told him to just use the other entrance and faggeta bout it! He's taking my advice.
Hey you shud be a playwright! Thanks for your and everyone else's advice. Well taken...
R
Gil
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Thanks Aiea, that made so much more sense.
By chance, is there a speed bump in front of wackadoodles home? Then that would explain everything.
Sounds like ex's fiance (wackadoodle) is one of them crazy chicks. Good think that bill that takes away due process isn't passed yet. I think Oregon just passed a similar bill.
I would blast the song Lowrider and if asked respond with, "I don't use no gas peddle".
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YUP, and don't keep all of your eggs in one basket. :geekdanc:
Keep your primary HD (or secondary HD if your primary HD is so sweet) only at home and "bring or send" (via FFL of course)the rest or your favorites to "mainland" ;) or legal secondary location. :D
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Crimes or threats of violence have to be made to get a TRO. Just stay away, don't talk to them, and don't get lured into something. If the ex causes trouble, get witnesses and document it and make a police report showing that he's the victim.
Those can be made up. There have been many a case where the person doing the assaulting makes false claims against the other party, and gets the TRO and assault charges against them!
A judge will err on the side of "caution". They aren't going to consider your firearms rights, if someone claims someone else is harrassing/threatening them, and they have a "witness", you are screwed.
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Going forward, if any interactions need to be made between the party in question and ex, he should keep a log and document the interaction in writing. So these exchanges with the emails and the other parties like the daughter or whoever, you should already be logging.
Any interactions should not be made without the presence of a neutral 3rd party. I would not change driving patterns to satisfy the crazy person's whims. It only encourages more crazy behavior. Just carry out your life as you normally would, and ignore the other party. Any witnesses to intimidation or other behavior should be noted, and perhaps approached and talked to if they're a friendly 3rd party. If a TRO is filed against you, 3rd party statements against the crazy neighbor may be invaluable.
Also try googling the person's name and search for hawaii court documents as well. Generally if people are crazy, they did other crazy shit before, and may have a criminal record. If it came down to action in court, you could (hopefully) point to your spotless record, and compare it with the lunatic's.
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That's why I stopped posting any of my shooting activities on Facebook.