I don't mean this as a demeaning rant but a general comment about the incomprehensibility of women. I try to be open minded and not stuck to stereotypes but I see them reinforced over and over again in my own marriage, but in others too.
There seems to be a certain lack of attention to technical detail. For example my wife doesn't discover basic button functions on her cell phone whereas I know what they do because I pay attention when I press them and for how long I press them (holding buttons results in a different effect). Or she will try to change something on the radio and push buttons without looking what button she was pressing. Or buying a 4" Makita angle grinder when I told her a 4.5" Dewalt angle grinder. Overall a lack of looking at things with a technical scientific analytical mind.
But the bigger issue that prompted me to write this is inconsistent decisions or ideas based on emotion. For example making a decision or a judgment based on a perceived reality without even thinking about whether the perception is supported. She saw a couple for sale signs on homes and this led her to the conclusion there are so many houses on the market right now when of course, two realty signs do not constitute an accurate statistical representation of homes for sale. Maybe I am being too picky on that example but other things where emotions affect things that have no reason to be affected.
For example take a certain food. If she is in a bad mood or depressed mood she might say that she doesn't like that food, while at another time in a different circumstance she will like that food. And I don't mean she just doesn't feel like eating it right then, but actually doesn't like the taste. I explain that no matter whether I am happy or sad or whatever a Cinnabon (a food I really like) always tastes good. The chemicals that make up the flavors of a food I like do not change so my liking a food should not be contingent on my feelings. I might not feel hungry at a particular time but regardless a Cinnabon cinnamon roll tastes good.
The specific example that irked me most happened this weekend was that we were watching a movie called Dead Lands, about Maori tribes and a battle and revenge. In the combat scenes the Maori warriors make their cultural warrior face with their tongues sticking out. Now it was violent and a little bloody but it wasn't as bloody as Braveheart and my wife loves that movie. She didn't like this movie though/ Well after the movie she didn't want to kiss as she was grossed out by the way they showed their tongues. WTF? Why does a fictional movie that shows a cultural way of sticking out a tongue in a war face affect her feelings towards her own husband!? She sees that scene and all of a sudden she doesn't like kissing? Does she not consider that she liked kissing before and that nothing about kissing changed?
So I ask, is my wife broken or are all women like this?
I would normally stay away from a posting like this. But under certain circumstances I decided to reply to this. Your question is if your wife is broken or are all women like this? IMHO your wife is broken and so are you. Let me explain:
First let me qualify myself here. I am on my third wife. My first I was 19 and lasted 6 months. My second lasted 9.5 years. I have been currently married for 21 years (22 years next month). In the many years and numerous wives I have had I found a lot of what you wrote to be consistent with pretty much every wife and some girlfriends. But not everything.
I have never had a wife or GF deny kissing or any type of sex for any similar reason as such as you wrote. I guess I have been pretty lucky in that respect because if any woman in my life had done that to me I would have broken up with her or divorced her. In a similar story, my current wife hates coconut. Has hated it since I have known her. She has made this VERY clear. So one day after we moved here she called me up and told me that someone at work made Haupia pie and she told me how much she loved it. That is when I asked her if she knew what haupia was. She was pretty silent when I told her haupia was coconut. Since then she refuses to eat anything with haupia in it because she hates coconut. I really don't care. If it makes no sense to me I just say fuck it. Why should I concern myself with this? It is her issue and basically has nothing to do with me and thus doesn't affect me. I just accept it and I don't get frustrated. Why would you want to make yourself frustrated? It is the fact that you allow or make yourself frustrated over something that doesn't concern you that is the real problem here. Not the fact that she likes something one day and not the next. This is your issue IMHO. Not hers. Personally, I think you should see someone or do something about allowing someone to affect you in that way. It is not healthy.
Reading what you said about the button pushing. I have to say my current wife is VERY smart. She is the smartest person I know. But she is not very tech savvy. She has a smart phone and barely knows how to text with it. So why does the fact that she doesn't know how to properly push the button frustrate you? Who cares? Why does this concern you? If she asks you to help, you are the hero. There is no reason to get frustrated. If she never learns for herself how to properly push a button, that is her problem. Not yours. Why would you allow yourself to get frustrated over her lack of desire to learn a basic function? Offer to help (Just remember it is like teaching someone to drive) or keep your mouth shut. Either way, if you get frustrated that is on you. If she sits there frustrated with the phone and doesn't ask for help and you get frustrated that is on you. You are the one who is making or allowing yourself to get frustrated. It is not her doing it to you. You are responsible for your own feelings, not her. Dude, you really need to get some help. Do you realize how manini this is? If something this small gets you frustrated enough to bring it to a public forum I would suggest getting help.
You also talk about her having ideas based on emotion. I hate to tell you but a lot of the ideas you have written here in this forum about all sorts of subjects have been based on emotion. You have been blasted in this forum by others over your emotional ideas. Don't get me wrong, you are entitled to your feelings and the ideas that stem from them. But to get frustrated over your wife's emotional issues, while it might be acceptable to you, it is not very understanding of you. And it certainly isn't healthy. In order to deal with her emotional baggage you both need to learn what the correct tools are and how to use them. And if you both don't know what those tools are you two should seek help in finding out.
The whole reason for me writing this is not to blast you or try and make you out to be something you may feel you are not. It is to point out that in the grand scheme of things all of these issues you wrote about are so small that if they affect you so much you have to seek advice in a public forum then what is going to happen when something truly big comes along? It sounds to me like you are ill prepared to deal with all these small issues. You really need to learn how to cope with them. Otherwise a big issue will break you two apart. Maybe not right away. But as soon as some sort of resentment starts to build and either you or her (or both) don't know how to properly handle it, your marriage is over. This is JMHO.