Funny pics & videos thread (Read 161271 times)

MassConfusion

Re: Funny pics & videos thread
« Reply #240 on: November 02, 2021, 08:29:52 AM »
None are more hopelessly enslaved than those who falsely believe they are free. ― Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
 “The only difference between reality and fiction is that fiction needs to be credible.” ― Mark Twain

Flapp_Jackson

Re: Funny pics & videos thread
« Reply #241 on: November 02, 2021, 12:44:27 PM »
Welcome to clown world... Should be its own thread.

I'm not a Cop, but I sure feel like lethal force would have been justified -- or at the very least Tazed!   :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:
The reasonable man adapts himself to the world;
the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself.
Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable man.
-- George Bernard Shaw

hvybarrels

Re: Funny pics & videos thread
« Reply #242 on: November 02, 2021, 04:55:40 PM »
I don't think I ever want to go back to the mainland
Sharing is caring, but forced redistribution is communism.

MassConfusion

Re: Funny pics & videos thread
« Reply #243 on: November 02, 2021, 05:41:50 PM »
I don't think I ever want to go back to the mainland
I guess it is safe to say; in a world gone crazy, only the crazy are sane.
I would go back state side but it would have to be somewhere not densely populated.
None are more hopelessly enslaved than those who falsely believe they are free. ― Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
 “The only difference between reality and fiction is that fiction needs to be credible.” ― Mark Twain

mrgaf

Re: Funny pics & videos thread
« Reply #244 on: November 02, 2021, 08:23:49 PM »
A man has a dentist appointment. Before he goes his wife wants to 69. “No, I dont want to go to the dentist with you all over my breath” he says. But she won’t give up so gives in. When they finished, he goes into the bathroom and brushes for an hour, flosses for an hour and gargles with lysterine for an hour then goes to the dentist. He’s sitting in the chair and the dentist walks up and says “Ok, open up”. He opens his mouth and the dentist says “Oh my God!!” and quickly turns his head. The guy says “ Oh doctor I’m sorry about my breath!!” The dentist says “ No, your breaths fine. But your forehead smells like shit!!” :shaka: :shaka: :D
To argue with a person who has renounced the use of reason is like administering medicine to the dead.  Thomas Paine.

No man can get rich in politics unless he is a crook.  It cannot be done. Harry Truman

Only good liberal is one taking a dirt nap.

macsak

Re: Funny pics & videos thread
« Reply #245 on: November 02, 2021, 08:45:37 PM »
A man has a dentist appointment. Before he goes his wife wants to 69. “No, I dont want to go to the dentist with you all over my breath” he says. But she won’t give up so gives in. When they finished, he goes into the bathroom and brushes for an hour, flosses for an hour and gargles with lysterine for an hour then goes to the dentist. He’s sitting in the chair and the dentist walks up and says “Ok, open up”. He opens his mouth and the dentist says “Oh my God!!” and quickly turns his head. The guy says “ Oh doctor I’m sorry about my breath!!” The dentist says “ No, your breaths fine. But your forehead smells like shit!!” :shaka: :shaka: :D

heads

Inspector

Re: Funny pics & videos thread
« Reply #246 on: November 04, 2021, 04:45:21 AM »
A young lady, jobless and spurned by her lover, heads to the Manhattan docks to drown herself.
She has nothing, no friends, no family, she just wants to end it all.

And as she's about to jump, a handsome young sailor shouts, "stop! Don't do it!!"

And she says, "I've nothing in this world, I might as well end it!"

And he says, "Listen, listen. It's a rotten world, sure. But never end the thing the lord gave us without changing everything first. I'm leaving tomorrow on a boat for Europe. I know one of the stevedores. I'll find you a place to stowaway, and we can start a new life over there. I'll make you happy. You'll make me happy. It doesn't have to be like this."

And she agrees.

That night they meet in darkness and he smuggles her aboard one of the lifeboats belowdeck.

He brings her a blanket, and some food,
and for three weeks they have this tryst. Each night he brings her a sandwich and they talk and make passionate love until the dawn.

But.

After the third week, the captain is doing a routine inspection belowdecks, and he hears a quiet rustling in one of the lifeboats
And he pulls back the tarp and sees her, shaking in fear.

"WHAT are you doing here, madam??"

And she tells all, "I...I'm a stowaway! I have an...arrangement with one of the sailors on this ship. He's helping us get to Europe, and he lets me hide out in this lifeboat, smuggling me food."

"And?" says the captain

"And...well. He's screwing me."

and the captain says,

"He sure is lady, this is the Staten Island Ferry!"
SCIENCE THAT CAN’T BE QUESTIONED IS PROPAGANDA!!!

Flapp_Jackson

Re: Funny pics & videos thread
« Reply #247 on: November 04, 2021, 01:59:07 PM »
Maybe we need to combine the Jokes thread with this one?  People are starting to post jokes here without Pics and Videos.

Just a thought.
The reasonable man adapts himself to the world;
the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself.
Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable man.
-- George Bernard Shaw

MassConfusion

Re: Funny pics & videos thread
« Reply #248 on: November 05, 2021, 07:50:01 AM »
Maybe we need to combine the Jokes thread with this one?  People are starting to post jokes here without Pics and Videos.

Just a thought.
None are more hopelessly enslaved than those who falsely believe they are free. ― Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
 “The only difference between reality and fiction is that fiction needs to be credible.” ― Mark Twain

mrgaf

Re: Funny pics & videos thread
« Reply #249 on: November 05, 2021, 06:27:18 PM »


Remind you of our troll?
To argue with a person who has renounced the use of reason is like administering medicine to the dead.  Thomas Paine.

No man can get rich in politics unless he is a crook.  It cannot be done. Harry Truman

Only good liberal is one taking a dirt nap.

MassConfusion

None are more hopelessly enslaved than those who falsely believe they are free. ― Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
 “The only difference between reality and fiction is that fiction needs to be credible.” ― Mark Twain

aaronc5362

Re: Funny pics & videos thread
« Reply #251 on: November 06, 2021, 04:04:10 AM »
 :thumbsup:

MassConfusion

Re: Funny pics & videos thread
« Reply #252 on: November 06, 2021, 12:29:58 PM »
None are more hopelessly enslaved than those who falsely believe they are free. ― Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
 “The only difference between reality and fiction is that fiction needs to be credible.” ― Mark Twain

aieahound

Re: Funny pics & videos thread
« Reply #253 on: November 06, 2021, 10:52:47 PM »
Kinda funny

Flapp_Jackson

Re: Funny pics & videos thread
« Reply #254 on: November 06, 2021, 11:03:41 PM »
The reasonable man adapts himself to the world;
the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself.
Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable man.
-- George Bernard Shaw

aieahound

Re: Funny pics & videos thread
« Reply #255 on: November 07, 2021, 04:20:28 PM »
That’s why it was only kinda funny.  :D

This one is probably a repost too but it’s bad ass. Just came to mind and watched again and posted for those who haven’t seen it (if anyone).

The end 20 seconds is the story because the video segment is longer.
Everyone needs a friend like that.

Flapp_Jackson

Re: Funny pics & videos thread
« Reply #256 on: November 07, 2021, 09:49:47 PM »
The reasonable man adapts himself to the world;
the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself.
Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable man.
-- George Bernard Shaw

aieahound

Re: Funny pics & videos thread
« Reply #257 on: November 09, 2021, 10:06:20 PM »

Rocky

Re: Funny pics & videos thread
« Reply #258 on: November 14, 2021, 09:02:46 AM »








#mywifestilllovesme  :)
« Last Edit: November 14, 2021, 09:09:51 AM by Rocky »
“I ask you to judge me by the enemies I have made.”
                                                           Franklin D. Roosevelt

Inspector

Re: Funny pics & videos thread
« Reply #259 on: November 15, 2021, 01:23:50 AM »


Lyrics in english:

Once the rent has been paid, you are back in the meadows
Eurochaos, stock market crises
pensions scarce and zero devies [Alone]
Always pop or borrow, installments pay tax worries
get it the day after tomorrow!

With the PumpGun
to the bank, yes,
Thank goodness man
there's a PumpGun

The little brother is nervous,
mother-in-law doesn't want to go home,
Press once ten Bullets can be seen flying
Employment office don't hear anything about it.
Weather outside is always cloudy
45 caliber to the bank just opposite [Alone]
Long time, undecided or simply dissatisfied
s*** overall situation,
most important: ammunition
Your computer is screwed up,
everything is pissing you off,
sawn, laid out. Sporty, slim yes

with the PumpGun.
Thank goodness man
there's a PumpGun

But be careful with the device, (bang) [Alone]
Oh too late [Alone]
SCIENCE THAT CAN’T BE QUESTIONED IS PROPAGANDA!!!