My daddy got 81,283,098 votes. Yep, (sniff), my daddy. Back in 2020. (sniff).
These 81 million, two hundred eighty three thousand, and ninety eight people did the smart thing. They ushered in the most brilliant, honest, and greatest man ever to be, excuse me...(sniff) the president of the (sniff) united states. (cough, hack). And brought (sniff) this country (sniff) to where (sniff) it is (sniff) today. (hack).
Where da f*ck is my gun bag dammit........(sniff).