can't tell the satire from the real news...

Unfortunately, and sadly, that is literally true.

Thus The Babylon Bee had to start a companion website for stories that are so unbelievably stupid or absurd, but real, that they would appear to be satire... but aren't.

From today's selections:

https://notthebee.com/

 

 

All these precautions I would venture to say is better than catching and spreading covid....

That’s your theory.

Will do, the day you can promise me your actions will not effect me.   

You can smoke all you want.  I don't give a fuck it's your freedom.  But the second your smoke effects me then it's no longer your freedom.   It infringes on mine.

That’s your theory.

The SAFETY CULTISTS in those 16 states must be having conniption fits... "HOW DARE YOU!!!" "Absolutely reckless" says the guy being recalled in the most populous state in the U.S., and he's being recalled for one and only one reason: his "handling" of THE VIRUS!!! (the imposition of ineffective job and economy and individual liberty crushing "emergency proclamations", for a year now).

https://www.aier.org/article/16-states-are-now-following-the-science/

16 States Are Now Following The Science

It took an entire year, but lockdowns and mask mandates are officially incredibly unpopular with half of the country [and then there is the fascist authoritarian wanna-be-police population of Hawaii...], to the point that governors are rapidly making sweeping changes to their year-long COVID-19 policies.

Jumping onto the coattails of pro-individual freedom leaders like governors Ron DeSantis (R-Florida) and Kristi Noem (R-SD), the governors of Mississippi and Texas decided Tuesday to announce an end to business restrictions and statewide mask mandates.

Both Tate Reeves (R-MS) and Greg Abbott (R-TX), who had long taken a nanny state approach to the COVID-19 crisis, acted almost simultaneously to announce the end of statewide restrictions.

The centrally planned solutions to COVID-19 have failed spectacularly, and the American people have taken notice of this reality. Hundreds of millions have now been through a full year of government-imposed tyranny on both a federal and state level. Whether it was a travel ban, an endless series of lockdowns, mask mandates, countless emergency orders, business closures, and the like, not a single top-down order from the federal or state level did anything productive for the wellbeing of Americans.

None of it worked. All of it served as a net negative. The people have noticed.

Now that their constituents have had enough, politicians on the Right are fast departing from the COVID tyranny, and attempting to secure what is left of their political aspirations.

Abbott and Reeves are not the only GOP governors moving fast in ending the restrictions, several other governors have recently acted to roll them back.

On February 12, Montana Governor Greg Gianforte lifted his statewide mask mandate.

On February 8, Iowa Governor Kim Reynolds lifted Iowa’s statewide mask mandate along with several other restrictions.

On February 22, North Dakota took it a step further. Its legislative body took the bold step in voting to make mask mandates illegal.

As of March 2, there are now 16 states that no longer have statewide mask orders.

However, across the political divide, there remains no end in sight to the corona madness. Much of the Left continues to embrace and root on endless COVID-19 restrictions, and the hijacking of individual rights in the name of a virus.

Governor Gavin Newsom of California took to Twitter in describing the end of restrictions as “absolutely reckless.”

It took long enough, but it’s now official: Governors who continue to impose lockdowns and mask mandates are fast becoming as popular as Red Sox fans in the Yankee Stadium bleachers, at least in half of the country. The internal polling is out, and the draconian restrictions are being abandoned in droves. History will not be kind to the remaining high-handed holdouts.

Review of a book, article and writings in general of Yuval Harrari in which he more or less echoes the demands of the SAFETY CULT (i.e. we must impose "public health" martial law because there is some possibility, however remote, that your behavior can cause a health problem, to some degree, for someone somewhere some time...kneel down slave). Exactly the dangerous failed hypothesis of some posters here. Here's my public health martial law emergency proclamation, to be in effect until such persons no longer exist: cull the population of people incapable of critical thinking and thus reaching rational and logical conclusions. They're the danger to us.

https://www.aier.org/article/yuval-noah-hararis-terrifying-pandemic-future/

Yuval Noah Harari’s Terrifying Pandemic Future


Excerpts:

It is therefore not a surprise that his long-read in the Financial Times last week (‘Lessons from a year of Covid’) didn’t exactly resonate with me. He does however raise what I find to be the most difficult and most engaging question of our times: how groups of humans peacefully coexist.

...

Where Harari strays in is his analysis of the political sphere. Citing places like Australia or Vietnam, he says that “We can beat the virus — but we aren’t sure we are willing to pay the cost of victory. That’s why the scientific achievements have placed an enormous responsibility on the shoulders of politicians.”

He correctly identifies the problem with the “Trust the Scientists” crowd, even though I suspect he’d take their side in the debates over climate change:

“Science cannot replace politics. When we come to decide on policy, we have to take into account many interests and values, and since there is no scientific way to determine which interests and values are more important, there is no scientific way to decide what we should do.” (emphasis added)

This is precisely right: science can only give us the relevant trade-offs (and often, not even that), but the values of what’s the better outcome are provided by the only entities that assess them: us, individually.

...
 

“In the age-old war between humans and pathogens, the frontline passes through the body of each and every human being. If this line is breached anywhere on the planet, it puts all of us in danger.”

Let’s ignore the final call for an expanded WHO with extra powers (military, perhaps?) and the dawning of a world government, and focus instead on the ethical obligation that now runs rampant in our broken societies: everyone’s health is everyone else’s business. Your wants, desires, habits, and routines are mine to police; after all, if we’re not careful, your body could be the source of the next global disease. That means I, or some national or global entity that I control, must be in charge of your life.

It is a scary world into which Professor Harari wants us to happily and voluntarily walk.

inb4 the village idiot starts talking about "effect" on his "freedom"

Review of a book, article and writings in general of Yuval Harrari in which he more or less echoes the demands of the SAFETY CULT (i.e. we must impose "public health" martial law because there is some possibility, however remote, that your behavior can cause a health problem, to some degree, for someone somewhere some time...kneel down slave). Exactly the dangerous failed hypothesis of some posters here. Here's my public health martial law emergency proclamation, to be in effect until such persons no longer exist: cull the population of people incapable of critical thinking and thus reaching rational and logical conclusions. They're the danger to us.

https://www.aier.org/article/yuval-noah-hararis-terrifying-pandemic-future/

Yuval Noah Harari’s Terrifying Pandemic Future


Excerpts:

It is therefore not a surprise that his long-read in the Financial Times last week (‘Lessons from a year of Covid’) didn’t exactly resonate with me. He does however raise what I find to be the most difficult and most engaging question of our times: how groups of humans peacefully coexist.

...

Where Harari strays in is his analysis of the political sphere. Citing places like Australia or Vietnam, he says that “We can beat the virus — but we aren’t sure we are willing to pay the cost of victory. That’s why the scientific achievements have placed an enormous responsibility on the shoulders of politicians.”

He correctly identifies the problem with the “Trust the Scientists” crowd, even though I suspect he’d take their side in the debates over climate change:

“Science cannot replace politics. When we come to decide on policy, we have to take into account many interests and values, and since there is no scientific way to determine which interests and values are more important, there is no scientific way to decide what we should do.” (emphasis added)

This is precisely right: science can only give us the relevant trade-offs (and often, not even that), but the values of what’s the better outcome are provided by the only entities that assess them: us, individually.

...
 

“In the age-old war between humans and pathogens, the frontline passes through the body of each and every human being. If this line is breached anywhere on the planet, it puts all of us in danger.”

Let’s ignore the final call for an expanded WHO with extra powers (military, perhaps?) and the dawning of a world government, and focus instead on the ethical obligation that now runs rampant in our broken societies: everyone’s health is everyone else’s business. Your wants, desires, habits, and routines are mine to police; after all, if we’re not careful, your body could be the source of the next global disease. That means I, or some national or global entity that I control, must be in charge of your life.

It is a scary world into which Professor Harari wants us to happily and voluntarily walk.

inb4 the village idiot starts talking about "effect" on his "freedom"

Is that his new handle now? We should keep a list.... 

Science > politics.   I'd choose a scientist over a politician any day. 

Science > politics.   I'd choose a scientist over a politician any day.

That’s your theory.

so naive

Useful idiot!

Sent from my SM-A102U using Tapatalk

Useful idiot!

Sent from my SM-A102U using Tapatalk

His new name by Mac is “Village Idiot”. But “Useful Idiot” works, too! 

so naive

He’s so pathetic, isn’t he? 

He’s so pathetic, isn’t he? 

That’s your theory.

That’s your theory.

Not very original are you? 

I know I am getting under your skin you pathetic little man. 

Enjoy!

Not very original are you? 

I know I am getting under your skin you pathetic little man. 

Seems more like the theory of many here!

Sent from my SM-A102U using Tapatalk

Seems more like the theory of many here!

Sent from my SM-A102U using Tapatalk

True dat!!! 

After huge mostly peaceful demonstrations against the useless unscientific "mitigation measures" (aka destroy the economy and your life irrational diktats) weeks ago, some of those upset Dutch people used the tactic of a mostly peaceful explosive device to make their point. Get ready for self-righteous Black Lies Matter/antifa supporting SAFETY CULT members screeching and whining... and stepped up "policing". "No mask(s), go to jail!"

https://www.thegatewaypundit.com/2021/03/bomb-destroys-covid-testing-center-netherlands-weeks-shutdowns/

BOMB Destroys COVID Testing Center in The Netherlands After Weeks of Shutdowns

A COVID testing center was destroyed by a bomb blast Wednesday in Bovenkarspel, in Noord Holland.

The blast smashed windows and damaged the facility. A security guard was inside at the time but was not injured.

The Sun.com reported:

A BOMB explosion rocked a coronavirus testing centre in the Netherlands early today – weeks after anti-lockdown riots left the country reeling.

Police said a homemade device was deliberately placed in what appeared to be a “targeted attack” just before 7am local time.

The blast smashed windows at the regional health board testing centre in Bovenkarspel, in Noord Holland, shortly before it was due to open.

Only one security guard was on duty inside, and there were no reported injuries.

Broadcaster NOS said a metal pipe exploded outside the building.

Ted Cruz delivers an almost 9 minute tirade against Gavin Newsom's claim that the Texas end to mask mandates and opening businesses and schools 100% is "absolutely reckless", on Maria Bartiromo show. Yeah, he uses the term "follow the science" and asserts that the largely Democrat state of California is recalling Newsom because Newson did NOT "follow the science"... to the detriment of many millions of people in numerous ways, especially low income adults and children.