Check this one out. Be sure to see the screen pictures at the end of the chats.

LOL

http://www.theverge.com/2015/3/25/8277743/tinder-hack-bros-swiping-bros

Lol!  That's classic!

This video will help people just in case they encounter a police officer.

This video will help people just in case they encounter a police officer.

...
This is pretty old, but still one of my all time fav vids.
My other fav comedy vids are mencia how to get a job.


Also triumph at the star wars premiere

This is a joke.... Baltimore... lol posting some funny meme

A young man named Chuck bought a horse from a farmer for $250. The farmer agreed to deliver the horse the next day.

The next day, the farmer drove up to Chuck’s house and said, “Sorry son, but I have some bad news, the horse died.”

Chuck replied, “Well, then just give me my money back.”

The farmer said, “Can’t do that. I went and spent it already.”

Chuck said, “Ok, then, just bring me the dead horse.”

The farmer asked, “What ya gonna do with him?”

Chuck said, “I’m going to raffle him off.”

The farmer said, “You can’t raffle off a dead horse!”

Chuck said, “Sure I can. Watch me. I just won’t tell anybody he’s dead.”

A month later, the farmer met up with Chuck and asked, “What happened with that dead horse?”

Chuck said, “I raffled him off. I sold 500 tickets at five dollars apiece and made a profit of $2,495.”

The farmer said, “Didn’t anyone complain?”

Chuck said, “Just the guy who won. So I gave him his five dollars back.”

Chuck grew up and now works for the government.   

Japanese doctor

A young man named Chuck bought a horse from a farmer for $250. The farmer agreed to deliver the horse the next day.

The next day, the farmer drove up to Chuck’s house and said, “Sorry son, but I have some bad news, the horse died.”

Chuck replied, “Well, then just give me my money back.”

The farmer said, “Can’t do that. I went and spent it already.”

Chuck said, “Ok, then, just bring me the dead horse.”

The farmer asked, “What ya gonna do with him?”

Chuck said, “I’m going to raffle him off.”

The farmer said, “You can’t raffle off a dead horse!”

Chuck said, “Sure I can. Watch me. I just won’t tell anybody he’s dead.”

A month later, the farmer met up with Chuck and asked, “What happened with that dead horse?”

Chuck said, “I raffled him off. I sold 500 tickets at five dollars apiece and made a profit of $2,495.”

The farmer said, “Didn’t anyone complain?”

Chuck said, “Just the guy who won. So I gave him his five dollars back.”

Chuck grew up and now works for the government.   

he actually only made a profit of $2,245.00
 

he actually only made a profit of $2,245.00
 

He still wants a horse, so he'll need to spend about $250 from the raffle income for another live horse.  That assumes $250 is the going rate for the horse he wants.

The dead horse might still have value it there's a glue factory nearby.  Since he refunded the winning ticket, he still owns that horse. 

That means he's up $1995 cash after paying for the replacement horse and ticket refund, but add back on top of that whatever the dead horse is worth.

But then again, it's a joke. 

                       

He still wants a horse, so he'll need to spend about $250 from the raffle income for another live horse.  That assumes $250 is the going rate for the horse he wants.

The dead horse might still have value it there's a glue factory nearby.  Since he refunded the winning ticket, he still owns that horse. 

That means he's up $1995 cash after paying for the replacement horse and ticket refund, but add back on top of that whatever the dead horse is worth.

But then again, it's a joke. 

 

 

   Five points of advice to live a happy life:

  You should find a woman that helps you with the cleaning and the chores.
You should find a woman that is a good cook.
You should find a woman that you can trust and share your feelings with.
You should find a woman that enjoys making love to you.
Last and the most important thing is that these 4 women should never meet.

A young Chinese couple gets married. She's a virgin.
Truth be told, he is a virgin too, but she doesn't know that.
On their wedding night, she cowers naked under the sheets as her husband undresses in the darkness.
He climbs into bed next to her and tries to be reassuring.
'My darring,' he whispers, 'I know dis you firss time and you berry flighten. I promise you, I give you anyting you want, I do anyting - juss anyting you want. You juss ask. Whatchu want?' he says, trying to sound experienced and worldly, which he hopes will impress her.
A thoughtful silence follows and he waits patiently (and eagerly) for her request.
She eventually shyly whispers back, 'I want to try something I have hear about from odda girls... Numbaa 69.' More thoughtful silence from him.
Eventually, in a puzzled tone he asks her.... 'You want....... garlic chicken wif snow peas??!!'

Living with those Beotches ruined the dude.....but he looks better than his wife and no more f'd up than the rest of them.